When God Says "No" to a Noble Dream

Read: 1 Chronicles 22:7-16 & Acts 16:6-10

One of the biggest–and often, most frustrating–tests of faith for people who are seeking to follow God’s will for their lives are those times when God seems to put a dream in our heart, and lead us toward the realization of that dream for a time, but then stops us short before our dream becomes a reality.

I, for one, have had this scenario play out more than once in my own life, and can therefore attest to the fact that it’s not a pleasant or fun experience. For illustration purposes, let me just sketch out one of my most life-altering experiences of this scenario. Although, strictly speaking, my PhD is in English, I had managed to integrate my growing interest in the emerging fields of Disability Studies and Disability Ethics into my doctoral work. The scholarly work that I did in these fields during my doctorate led to my being invited to apply for the position of Postdoctoral Fellow on a research team examining end-of-life issues affecting people with disabilities. The position was two provinces away from my home, and people with my severity of disability don’t usually pull up stakes and move halfway across the country for work! But God wanted me there, so He provided, not only the job, but also accessible housing with attendant care, plus an agreement that I could return home after a year, and complete the second half of the contract from there, so that I could help care for my mother, who was suffering from dementia. When that first postdoc ended, God provided a second postdoc, specifically in Disability Ethics, at my home university. At the end of my second postdoc, I was hired by my home university to develop and implement a Certificate Program in Disability Ethics. It seemed obvious that God had equipped, led, and positioned me to develop and run this program. Yet, within the next eighteen months, Faculty administrations changed, there was a university-wide budget cut-back, and both the would-be Certificate Program and my job were terminated.

Did I get it wrong? Did I somehow misjudge the way that God was leading me?  These are natural questions in these circumstances. Yet, in reading the Bible, I find that I’m not the first person to find ostensible dead-ends and unexpected U-turns along the path that God leads me.  On the contrary, it turns out that I’m in pretty good company! King David, for example, had it in his heart to build a temple for the Lord. He even receives initial encouragement from the prophet Nathan (2 Samuel 7:2-3). But God abruptly nixes David’s noble plan, announcing that it is not David, but rather David’s son whom He has chosen to build a temple (2 Samuel 7:12-13). Similarly, Luke reports in Acts 16:6-7 that “Paul and his companions traveled throughout the region of Phrygia and Galatia, having been kept by the Holy Spirit from preaching the word in the province of Asia. When they came to the border of Mysia, they tried to enter Bithynia, but the Spirit of Jesus would not allow them to.” Here again, we see God saying a firm “No!” to the noble plan of His servants, despite the fact that circumstances would indicate that He was the one who had led them towards the conception and completion of that plan. Thus faced with God’s seemingly inexplicable negation of a noble plan, His servants are challenged to accept the ultimate wisdom and graciousness of His leading, and, in faith, continue to follow.

Gracious All-Knowing Father, in those times when you say no to a noble dream of mine, help me remember that, if you were small enough for my finite mind to be able to understand all of your ways, you would cease to be God.  May I learn to trust your unfailing goodness and love for me so that I can continue to follow you wholeheartedly–even through the apparent dead-ends and U-turns.  In Jesus’ name. Amen.